*** The first three books in my six-part dystopian series have officially made their way out into the world! Check them out!
For the sake of blogging, self-exploration, and contemplation, I’ve been slowly making my way through answering questions from this list
Today’s Question: What’s the most important lesson that you’ve learned this year?
I’m no stranger to being betrayed by friends that I thought I could trust, treated as disposable, gaslit, etc — but what is different now than the way things used to be is that I react differently when things like that happen, and now I DO actually have some good friends and people who know me well enough and care enough to stick up for me, stand with me, and just be there for me when others are being crappy to me or when crappy things are happening.
I grew up with narcissist parents who were not there for me at all. Instead they were often the source of some – not all, but some – of the shitty and painful things that I went through at a young age, so I definitely got used to reacting strongly when I found myself in crappy situations because I had no one else to lean on or depend on because I learned back then that if I didn’t stand up for myself, no one else was going to do it for me.
Now, I’m finally learning to just sit back and trust that karma will sort things out, and it does. Crappy things are no longer the end of the world. I’m not saying that it doesn’t suck to discover that I misjudged someone, nor am I saying that it doesn’t suck when something in life isn’t working out how I wanted it to, but I can handle things in stride now. In truth I can’t isolate this lesson to JUST this year, but this year there has been a lot of change, some good and some bad, and it’s definitely tested my resolve and given me an opportunity to be this different person that I’ve worked hard to become. I’ve learned that I can trust myself, trust my instincts, and I can trust karma to sort things out if I’m just honest and patient. I’d say that’s a pretty important lesson.
Kell Frillman - Author 